I'm still at it twerps

It's been a week since I've started this and believe it or not I've been working out, eating healthy (ehhh..), and staying on top of my Shiieeett.

I only started using my Nike + sportband Wednesday though, so I'm going to wait until either Sunday or Monday to post my first set of results and an overall summary of how the week went.

But for now, I wanted to share some GOOD NEWS. I've found something to compete in!

"Mighty North Fork" Triathlon

It's a USA Triathlon sanctioned event that takes place July 11 in Southold, New York.

• SWIM - 500 meter
  
• BIKE -8 miles
  
• RUN - 3.5 miles

FEW FUN FACTS:

• I'M SCREWED!
• The odds of me drowning are high
• The odds of me donkey kicking competitors underwater are also high
• Their are about 300-400 people who participate
• I'ma do my best to WHOOP 300-400 hineys
  

RULES (because the word diet frightens me), WORK OUT PLAN FOR THE WEEK

This is what I have so far as "rules", as well as this week's fitness plan. Considering it's day 1 and I know more about Jewish pastries then I do about dieting or anything relating to fitness, I'd like to point out that this first week will serve as a testing ground so to speak where I'll have room to figure out what works and what doesn't. It will also give me the time to continue researching what is the best way for me to eat and work out for the weeks following.

"BEFORE STATS" -don't know your fitness terminology, but I do know infomercial terminology of "Before" and "After"

With the help of a Nike+ Sportband I will track my distance, pace, time, and calories burned, which I'll be able to upload on here. This first week's use of the band will set the BEFORE stats and help me better understand how much I'll need to work out a day to be prepared AND how much I'll need to eat. Along with the Nike + Sportband BEFORE stats, I'll also be including my weight and/or BMI, resting heart rate, and a lovely before photo of my out of shape zero muscle body! and if anyone thinks I should add anything to the BEFORE stats let me know.

SETTING RULES

so for this week I'm going to see how Giuliana Rancic's "meal plan" works...aka if I too can be an anorexic Pixar Ant and live off of insect portion meals...

big heads big rules are as follows:

NO SUGAR unless raw

NO SODA

NO CONDIMENTS

NO COFFEE - (not happening)

The rest of her meal plan can be found here on her blog.

Today I had her breakfast which I plan to follow for the rest of the week..

BIG HEAD BREAKFAST:

• obe one kinobi tea or something, who knows (substituting the coffee in, sorry)
• grapefruit
• egg white veggie omelette, ALWAYS with spinach - because it tastes gross and this woman clearly hates her life
• water with half a lemon and a PINCH of cayenne pepper... she uses this to regulate her metabolism, and its supposed to be really helpful if you're looking to lose some weight. But if you want to lose weight and you plan on trying this at home - she stresses the PINCH of cayenne... its basically just grounded hot chili peppers which means not only is the taste very strong but if you use too much of it your stomach will most likely drop out of your butt.

LUNCH & DINNER:

Since I won't know what my caloric intake should be until I see this weeks Nike + plus results, I'm not going to worry about it just yet. This week will be all about experimenting with my new HEALTHY approach to eating with meals that will give me enough energy to really work out. These are a few meals I'll be having this week:

• Grilled chicken with steamed veggies, fruit if i need a sweet & 16oz bottle of water
• Sushi or Salmon with salad, more steamed veggies, still water
• Vegetable Soups, Black Bean Soups, any healthy hearty soups with even more steamed veggies and water...

OTHER RULES I'LL BE FOLLOWING INCLUDE:

• WATER WATER WATER AND MORE WATER
• IF I WANT COFFEE I have to walk my dog to town in order to get it which is 2 miles there and back..and I cant have more then 2 cups a day ( 2 LARGE CUPS)
• I CANT eat anything that's artificial and pre packaged and full of crap..alllll organic
• SUNDAY IS a cheat day. Sunday IS NOT a gorge your face day... be reasonable, not stupid.

Again, I'm looking for all the help I can get so please throw ideas and tips my way if you have any! Thanks!

Oh do continue reading..

While I'm sure that first post really wet your pallets and you're like Pavlov's dog just salivating out the mouth for more, I'll keep this second one short and sweet. I'm just rereading what I just posted and realized that not only have I seemingly made it my mission to prevent people from continuing to read this blog, but I did more of a tangent piece then I did a purposeful, sound, fluid one. But hey, like I said, I'm a virgin blogger.

So just to clarify, this is a blog I'm keeping as a means to track my workout and diet regimen and to keep an account of my daily trials and tribulations (always wanted to say that), all the good bad and ugly, basically everything and anything that has to do with my goal. With that said, what I failed to mention before was that this really started because I've always wanted to start a charity.. and I withheld saying that before because I know I'm already so over my head as it is with this goal that saying I'd like to start a charity on top of all this would just sound ludicrous to those who know me. BUT Im saying it now because that's the truth: my real drive behind starting this blog, and how I even began setting such a goal, was because I've had this desire to do something REAL and GENUINE in the back of my mind for quite a while now. I could get into why I feel this way but that's a wholeee other dragged on post in itself...one I may use to my advantage when I want to procrastinate in the coming weeks... MMM.. actually lets get it out of the way..

so yes, I want to start a charity. I don't know how people see me, so I really don't know if this is a surprise to any of you or not..but as crazy, bitchy, wild, shy, crazy, dry, wet, crazy, however you may see me - all I know about myself is that I have a deep deep empathy for others and its truly the only clear defining character trait that I know of myself. And with all that I've experienced, especially within these past few months, I'm starting to realize how important it is for me to feed this empathetic side of me.

I've struggled with some pretty ugly personal demons in my life, and I've just recently had the oppurtunity to put my life on hold and.. save it... as weird as that sounds. Anddd I could touch on this for millions of posts to come and never even come close to explaining just how much signifigance and impact it had on my life..so I'll leave that at that. But I will say that one of the many things this experience and time off did give me was the chance to really look at who I am and the direction I was going in. And now that I have a better handle on my most pressing issues and I redirected my course in that arena, I now have my other "routes" to tackle, one being that of my career.

I have, just like most of us, always struggled with what I want to be and what I want to do with the life I've been given; what career path am I going to take. Up to right now I have never really known what I've wanted to do, and I still don't. I have absolutely no clue. I've had a good deal of experience in the fashion industry after years of internships and while I enjoyed them and succeeded in them, have a lot of potential to do well pursuing careers in that industry, I'm not sold on the fact that that's my true calling and that I would be enjoying that for years to come. Something just seems to be tugging at me and I have this feeling like I'm missing something..that i may be making a mistake heading down that route.

I've waited long enough for an AHA moment and when dealing with my other issues I've learned that there's no such thing. SO to finally make some sort of point in all of this, I hope to use this goal, both the big one and the even bigger one, to help me find clarity and maybe some answers. I have heard the "it starts with one step" buddhist motivational phrase more then I would've like to and I figured I may as well take that in it's literal form... thus, my goal at hand.

SO since this is day 1 and my only form of exercize has been walking my dog this morning, I'm going to stop writing gargantuan posts and actually start this whole damn thing.

Which right now means finishing this heinous cayenne pepper/lemon water death drink and then get aerobically raped by traci anderson... all of which you'll be hearing about later today ..oh joy

The Things You Do When You Take Your ADD Medication..

I can't believe I'm actually doing this (let alone TYPING this->) blog.

The word "blog" to me has always been synonymous with the word "blagh"...and not "blah" as in Kesha's astonishingly deep lyrics.. but"blagh", as in the sound you make when throwing up.

I've always found blogs, like twitter, to be extremely self obsessive.. and while there are some who have interesting blogs (Irina you mah girl) MOST people who keep a blog or twitter account should really save us and all that time they spend updating the damn things and just say "Hi, I'm a raging narcissist" and leave it at that.

And honestly I don't know how they do it because I am just the lift of my right pinky away from deleting what I've written so far out of pre-ejac embarrassment for when this baby posts(yes i just said that)

SO why am I doing this then, you may ask? CHARITY. Yes, even someone as grumpy as me has a heart.

Basically my plan is to do a tri-athalon or marathon of some sort this summer and raise money for a charity. Since I'm literally the least motivated human and I've never done a marathon, or let alone actually work out per say, I thought the best way to MAKE me work out and KEEP me working out is if I A. do it for a cause and B. blog about it so those very few whom I give this blog address out to know I'm doing and therefore I will be less inclined to slack off or do anything that would make me look like the complete lazy shit that I usually am.

HOWEVER.. it's important to point out that my mind gave birth to this idea Whilst my vyvanse caplet gave birth too its ADD fighting time released beads in my belly.

sssoo..we'll see what's to come of this (if anything)...

Or to be positive, lets say "stay tuned"..